"America's relationship with insane Teletubby Kim Jong Un has never been better," Trevor Noah said on Wednesday's Daily Show. "In fact, things have been looking so optimistic that President Trump is even getting some awards buzz." He laughed at Trump's "fake humility" over the Nobel Peace Prize scuttlebutt but not Trump's obvious joy. "Have you ever seen Donald Trump this genuinely happy before?" he asked. "He looks happier than Ben Carson in a mattress store."
But then North Korea threatened to cancel June's Kim-Trump summit, "which is such a drag for President Trump," Noah said. "This is the one thing that he was going to do right. Now they're screwing him so hard it's going to cost him $130,000." Still, North Korea has some seemingly legitimate reasons, like National Security Adviser John Bolton saying North Korea should emulate the "Libya model" of denuclearization. "What kind of moron uses what the U.S. did in Libya as a sales pitch to another dictator?" Noah asked. "'Kim Jong Un, here's our opening offer: You, shot in the head on the side of the road. Hello?'"
At The Opposition, Jordan Klepper was outraged. "What kind of maniac suddenly walks away from a nuclear deal for no specific reason, just because he can?" he asked, pointing at Kim and Trump. "This chubby, egomaniacal tyrant cannot be trusted, and everybody in American knows who I'm talking about right now, with his dumb hair and his bad English." Besides, "all Bolton suggested is that Libya was a good role model for North Korea," he said. "It's an easy path to follow: Libya gave up its nuclear program, and pretty soon their country was in ruins and their leader was captured and killed by his own people. What's not to like, Kim?"
Like Noah, Klepper was worried about Trump: "What's this going to do to his upcoming campaign to win the Nobel Peace Prize?" Watch below. Peter Weber
"After years of saying he will do it, he did it," Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday's Late Show. President Trump announced he's withdrawing the U.S. from the Iran nuclear deal, claiming he always keeps his promises. "What are you talking about?" Colbert asked. "You literally just backed out of an American promise!"
"Nobody wants Iran to have nuclear weapons — that's what the treaty was supposed to stop," Colbert said, but Trump is apparently upset the deal sunsets. "So with these restrictions, Iran could possibly, eventually develop a nuke, and the solution is to lift the restrictions so they can start immediately? ... It's like saying, 'Well, Billy, this hamster is eventually going to die in a couple years, so we might as well flush Mr. Fluffers don't the toilet now.'"
In explaining why he's scrapping the Iran deal, Trump "raises some good points, except for the fact that they're all bulls--t," Trevor Noah said on The Daily Show. "Yeah it is true that the deal didn't address every single problem with Iran, but it did address the main problem, nuclear weapons. You can't get rid of the entire thing because it didn't fix everything. It's like saying, 'This detergent got the stains out of my shirt but it didn't save my crumbling marriage!'"
"This could lead to a horrible, destabilizing war, and even worse, we'll pay slightly more for gas," Noah deadpanned. "So that means when you're trying to flee the nuclear apocalypse, you'll have to look at your gas tank the whole time." And to hit home why this is so terrible for "America's credibility," he had a certain famous deal artist explain what happens to your reputation when you blow off deals.
Iran's president had a similar take, in The Late Show's imagined response: "In the past, we have called America 'The Great Satan,' but even Satan keeps his deals. Just ask Charlie Daniels." Watch below. Peter Weber